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19

Ephesians

Paul’s instructions to Husbands and Wives

Ephesians 5:22–33
This session explains God’s design for marriage, with wives submitting to husbands and husbands loving their wives sacrificially, reflecting Christ’s love for the church.

Lesson Objectives

By the end of this session, the group will have appreciated God’s design for marriage as a reflection of Christ’s love for the church.

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Additional Resources

Opening

30 minutes

The opening section focusses on starting the group time, building fellowship and reviewing progress

Welcome

As people arrive, take a few minutes to settle in, share tea or a cool drink if possible, and connect informally so that everyone feels welcomed, safe, and encouraged before the study begins.

Prayer

Begin with a brief prayer (led by the leader or another group member), asking God to prepare your hearts, guide your time together, and help you depend on Him as you learn.

Review

  • Personal check-in: Take time for each person to briefly share how they are doing, so the study stays connected to real life and each person’s current situation.
  • Prayer and praise sharing: Invite group members to share prayer needs and thanksgivings, so you can care for one another and grow in mutual spiritual support.
  • Application review: Ask each person to reflect on the action step they chose last time, encouraging practical obedience with grace and support rather than shame.
  • Memory review: Review Scripture memory together (in pairs if helpful), building confidence, consistency, and encouragement as you learn God’s Word.
  • Character growth check: Revisit the character qualities or growth areas from the previous session, helping the group grow in Christlike character as well as biblical understanding.
  • Personal Devotion review: Invite group members to share their progress in developing a habit of Personal Devotion.

Facilitator Notes

As the group leader or facilitator, it is important to prepare before by studying passage, looking for main idea, and think of some examples, stories or applications from your own life. Use the Additional Resources provided to help you.

Additional Resources

General guidelines

  • Help people feel at home with informal connection (small talk, tea/cool drink, etc.).
  • The goal of this opening section is to create safety, belonging, and relational warmth before the Bible study begins – especially important for people coming from high-pressure or vulnerable situations. The group is seen as a place of mutual encouragement, not just teaching.
  • The goal of the opening prayer time is to prepare hearts, invite God’s help, and frame the meeting as dependent on God rather than a purely academic exercise.
  • The Review and Reflection time is a critical, recurring section central to the method of transformational learning. It helps connect the study to real life and encourages spiritual growth over time.
  • Participants share about their week. This includes questions like “What are you thankful for this week?” and “What difficulties have you faced this week?”, both of which teach participants about prayer. Everyone learns to share their highs and lows in community.

Study

60 minutes

In this section we focus on the bible with the goal of understanding, interpreting and applying its truth to our lives.

Read

Read the Bible passage together (taking turns or following along), remembering that God speaks to us through His Word.

Ephesians 5:22–33

Observe & Reflect

Share what stood out to you in the passage, what you noticed, and how it made you feel, so that you can engage personally with God’s Word and contribute freely before the group moves into deeper discussion.

Discuss

Discuss the lessons and reflections drawn from the Scripture.

  1. Read Ephesians 5:22-33 aloud together slowly. Then have learners say what they have heard in their own words.
  2. What is the meaning of submission in your local community? Describe the husband-wife relationships at home.
  3. Read verses 21-24 and explain the biblical meaning of submission and its different applications.
  4. How can you relate to this understanding?
  5. Why do you think Paul emphasizes submission in this passage? What are the implications on the Christian households?
  6. Based on verse 21, why do you think Christ is the reference of submission between husband and wife?
  7. What does mutual love and respect look like in marriage?
  8. Why does Paul emphasize sacrificial love for husbands?
  9. How does marriage reflect God’s relationship with His people?

Application & Commitment

Use these questions to guide you in making practical applications for your life.

  1. How can married couples strengthen their relationship through Christ?
  2. How can believers support healthy marriages in the church?
  3. What lessons from this passage apply to all believers, married or not?
Additional Resources

Facilitator Notes

Guidelines for this study

Paul teaches about God’s design for marriage, emphasizing mutual love and respect between husbands and wives. Marriage is presented as a reflection of Christ’s relationship with His church.

General guidelines

  • Read the passage: Read the passage together before giving too much explanation. Let the group hear and encounter the text for themselves first.
    Where helpful, move from the bigger picture to the details: the wider context, the chapter, and then the specific verses.
  • Observe and reflect: Invite the group to share what stood out to them, what they noticed, or what struck them personally.
    This is an open and non-threatening way to help people engage with the text. It also helps you see what the group is noticing and feeling before moving into deeper discussion.
  • Discuss the passage: Guide the group with thoughtful questions so they can understand the passage more clearly and deeply.

Use different kinds of questions:

  • questions that help them observe what is in the text
  • questions that probe meaning more deeply
  • questions that clarify confusion or sharpen understanding

Your role is to help participants discover truth from Scripture, not only to tell them the answers. This is where the main lessons and principles of the passage are drawn out.

Closing

30 minutes

The final section ends with the memorisation and preparation tasks for the next week.

Sharing

Who can you share this lesson with this week? This should be a natural overflow from your heart as God brings about transformation in your life.

Next Orientation Task

In preparation for the next meeting, complete the following orientation task:

Ephesians 6:1–4

Close in prayer

Close in prayer by thanking God for what He has shown you, praying for one another’s commitments and specific needs, and asking the Holy Spirit to give you strength to live out His Word.

Wrap up

Before you finish, agree together on the next meeting time and any practical details, and encourage one another as you go.

Additional Resources

Facilitator Notes

General guidelines

  • Sharing with others: Where appropriate, ask whether there is someone they could share this lesson with during the week. This should be a natural overflow of what they are learning, not a forced exercise.
  • Memorisation task: Encourage meaningful internalisation of Scripture, not just repetition. The goal is for God’s Word to be carried in the heart and lived out.
  • Character focus: Give one or more character qualities or growth areas for members to reflect on during the week. This helps keep discipleship holistic and rooted in transformation.
  • Next orientation task: Give one simple task to prepare for the next meeting. This could include reading the next passage, reflecting on a question, noticing something in daily life, or trying a small practical action. Keep it clear and manageable.
  • Closing prayer: End in prayer, thanking God for what He has shown the group and asking for His help to live it out. Pray for specific needs, for the commitments made, and for the Spirit’s strength and guidance during the week.
  • Final encouragement and logistics: Close with any practical reminders and a word of encouragement. Help the group leave with clarity, hope, and a sense of being supported in the week ahead.
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Additional Resources

Series Resources

These resources offer additional information to support the group leader. They are designed to be used by the leader in preparation for a group meeting.

Leader Resources

These are general resources designed to equip group leaders and facilitators and help them to grow in leading well.

How to apply Scripture to your life

Learning Design

Lesson flow for facilitators

In-Person Discipleship Training

Principles for BMB Discipleship Groups

The First Contact

Participant Resources

These are general resources designed to support the participant in their personal devotional life between group meetings.

A Guide for Personal Devotion

A Simple Process for Memorisation

How to apply Scripture to your life